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The Vandals




Альбом The Vandals



1995
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N.I.M.B.Y. (AKA )
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. . .


For all those that are feeling way too fed up inside
Now here's a celebration of failure and losing
Like to put a shout out to all y'all far and wide
Sorry people but this is the way it's gotta be

I know, I know, I know, I know
we are pushing the parameters to a brand new low
The end is near there's lots to fear
No such thing as a good day is what I'm told
Let the bad times roll

The grass is never greener on the other side
I'll stay right here and frolic in the dirt and gravel
Where's the love in this room? I feel teary eyed.
Between you and me I don't think it's ever gonna change

Descend, rear end, offend a friend
It's wise of you to run and hide from what's around the bend
The end is near there's lots to fear
No such thing as a free lunch is what I'm told
Let the band times roll

Up to me I'll embrace them happily
let you people know I'm not foolin'
come take a ride with me down to Riverside
show you what it's like to be coolin'

Life's gotta be a little better overseas
whwre everyone's drivin' a Mercedes
unsatisfied with my mailorder bride
so much for my last attempt with the ladies

Listen to nobody this is the way I think
Tell 'em all you're gonna live at least until you're forty
Just be glad you're only one shade of blue in the face
Wake up smell the shit and think that everything is great

I know, I know, I know, I know
we are pushing the parameters to a brand new low
The end is near there's lots to fear
No such thing as a good day is what I'm told
Let the bad times roll

. . .


Let's go to the place where the food is really good
and my order's understood and they won't drown my food, yeah!
Get me to the seat, I wanna eat,
just a party of three Me! Me! Me! Yeah!

What is this stupid shit?
I didn't order this!
Not gonna pay for it!
Take it back! (x5)

Hello pretty lady, I'll only say it once
"meat and cheese only", don't fuck it up!
Here it goes again a conspiracy
are you plotting against me?
I said only meat and cheese, yeah

What is this stupid shit?
I didn't order this!
Not gonna pay for it!
Take it back! (x5)

I'll say it simple, so you can understand
get my food right, I am a hungry man
You say you're sorry, not realy a waitress
"I'm studying to be an actress"
Starting acting like a waitress!
...Food!

Do you wanna see me puke?
What are you retarted?
Pickles make me sick
let's get the eating started, yeah!

Here it goes again,
I said it all along,
meat and cheese only
it's wrong! Wrong! Wrong!

What is this stupid shit?
I didn't order this!
Not gonna pay for it!
Take it back! (x5)

. . .


Drowning in this toilet of shit they call life Work like hell at Taco Bell for
$4.25 an hour No one gives a squirt of piss if you f**king die So seize the
day by the balls, and squeeze until it's on it's knees And now we dance like
soldiers on the battlefield the only triumph in a moment of glory Crack your
head open and sue somebody Cop a feel on a punk rock girl in bondage pants
And Now We Dance You are just a speck in a universe of turds Silenced by
conspirators, not another word. With ozone trees depleted, you choke on
malathion.nothing f**king matters, so what's the use in tryin'? And now we
dance like warriors on the victory trail only triumph in a moment of glory
Crack your head open and sue somebody Come on and do push ups just like Jack
Pallance And Now We Dance Never join the ranks of the kiss ass suit and tie
or the stinking hippie, the future is worth a lie, nothing's worth a f**k, a
f**k ain't worth a shit we're only gonna die, here's how we deal with it And
Now We Dance like warriors on the battlefield only triumph in a moment of
glory Crack your head open and sue somebody Cop a feel on a punk rock girl in
bondage pants And Now We Dance we dance like warriors on the battlefield only
triumph in a moment of glory Crack your head open and sue somebody Come on
and do one handed push ups like Jack Pallance And Now We Dance

. . .


I saw a girl and she drove me wild
She looked at me and I looked and smiled
The cutest girl you'd ever see
I never dreamed she'd go out with me

We met at school so I asked her out
The only girl I ever thought about
She's 16 and she's so devine
I never thought I could make her mine

I'm in love, I just can't wait Tonight I have a date
I have a date with the cutest girl in town
I have a date and I'm the happiest boy around
I'm in love. I just can't wait 'cause tonight I have a date

Went to the movies in my parents car
I never dreamed I'd get that far
I picked her up at a quarter to eight
I got there early I didn't want to be late

I never thought it would come to this
I drove her home and she gave me a kiss
I'm in love and it's here to stay
She said she really wants to see me again

I'm in love, I just can't wait Tonight I have a date
I have a date with the cutest girl in town
I have a date and I'm the happiest boy around
I'm in love. I just can't wait 'cause tonight
I have a date

. . .


supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

even though the sound of it
is something quite attrocious
if you say it loud enough
you'll aways sound precocious

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

i was afriad to speak
when i was just a lad
my father gave my nose a tweak
and told me i was bad

and then one day i heard a word
to save my aching nose
it was the biggest word you ever heard
and this is how it goes..

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

even though the sound of it
is something quite attrocious
if you say it loud enough
you'll aways sound precocious

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

supercalifragilisticexpialidocious

i traveled all around the world
and everywhere i went
i used this word in all i say
i used this very word in all i said in did

i say my special word
and then they ask me out for tea

. . .


Mustache is a symbol of repression and of hate Never trust a man with a butt
broom on his face It's the facial marking of the man who holds you down The
source of all your problems, every city, every town Stalin, Hitler, Schneider,
just to name a few got to kill the mustache before it grows on you Fight!
The mustache power! (x3) Fight! Fight! Fight! Mustache is authority The world
is run by assholes They try to run our lives from their golden mustache
castles The Dark Prince was a nazi, his mustache true to form instead of arm-
band swastikas, mouse ears must be worn He terminates employees with the hair
above his lip 'cause in the Fuhrer's kingdom it's dictatorship We should take his
frozen corpse and shave his fascist face and make the magic kingdom a truly
happy place Fight! The mustache power! (x3) Fight! Fight! Fight! Pigs across
the nation dressed in uniform with their gun and badges, a mustache must be
worn they beat the population with their clubs inflicting pain with mustache
anonymity, they all look the same we must join together till the mustache is
removed and then we'll have a party with beer and chicks and food.Fight the
power! Fight the power mustache! Fight the power! Fight the power mustache!

. . .


The city council met last night the vote was one to six
Denying access to our town by TV's "G.E. Smith"
The Mayor cited nightmares had by his daughter Eileen
She dreamed that ugly fucker's face popped out the friggin' screen

They said no, they said no way.
Not in my Back yard he can not stay
That eyesore is a stain upon our nation
If you think he's livin' by me there's no way

G.E. felt the set back but refusing to surrender
He bought a house disguised as the guitarist of the Pretenders
But at the party we like to throw for new homeowners
we caught him when he couldn't play the lead from "Tattooed Love Boys"

They said no, they said no way.
Not in my Back yard he can not stay
That eyesore is a stain upon our nation
If you think he's livin' by me there's no way

A man has got the right to homestead anywhere he can
but that just begs the question, What exactly is a man?
Blond Frankenstein with Dutchboy hair would hardly qualify
So we must live free of this Hall & Oats reject or die

They said no, they said no way.
Not in my Back yard he can not stay
That eyesore is a stain upon our nation
If you think he's livin' by me there's no way

. . .


Just a grunt in a bind in his homeland Taking orders from a very very bad man
Just yer average Dieter, Helmut, or a Bertrand I can waste him 'cause I never
never shook his hand Killed by a hero, what are we supposed to do? just a
loser with a girlfriend getting fat and participation in a very very bad plan
In a nation where the bastards are the unplanned we can waste it 'cause it's such
a teeny tiny hand Killed by procedure, what are we supposed to do
(And Cornelius says) Ape shall never kill ape I say wouldn't that be great?
But some apes, they just gotta go We kill the ones that we don't know Not a
nobody, an actual American beaten silly by another Jody Foster fan Spend a
fortune to debate the moral conflict and He's protected through it's obvious
he killed a man Killed by the system, what are we supposed to do?

. . .


Intoxicated - the way I go through life
Inebriated - and then I pay the price
Designated drinker with a defected driver
I can't find my keys must have left them inside her
Eating Taco Bell and now I'm drinking gin and tonic
I think there's an answer but I can't put my finger on it
Mom please come pick me up I don't know where I am
It's the last think I'll ask
I just wanna live fast, diarrhea
Live fast! Diarrhea! [x3]
Punk is what it is - until you're getting paid
This is how I live, it's not a fucking phase
They don't understand, they think they're fucking rad
we should kill those guys, this is bullshit man
I followed Marshall Silver and I bootlegged Hooked on Phonics
I think there's an answer but I can't put my finger on it
Mom please come pick me up I don't know where I am
It's the last thing I'll ask
I just wanna live fast, diarrhea Live
fast! Diarrhea! [x3]

. . .


It's my birthday and I'll do what I want to
Fuck you, it's my birthday
A special holiday only for me, so do what I say
It's my party, I'll make you cry if I want to...or leave
Fuck you, it's not your birthday, so do what I say

For 24 hours, you're wishing me well, 364 days I'm in hell
Oh well
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
Alone on my birthday

I'm going to Denny's 10 times today, no tip!
It's my birthday, so do what I say
Thanks mom didn't have an abortion
Or my birthday wouldn't be today
But I guess it's just my good fortune, my birthday's today, ok

For 24 hours you're wishing me well, 364 days I'm in hell
Oh well
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
Spank me!
Oh well
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me

I can't believe you forgot my birthday
It's my birthday and you're wrecking it
Now it's just like every other day, you didn't do what I say
How could you forget my birthday?
That's really immature
Fuck you for forgettin my birthday, you didn't you what I say today

24 hours, no wishing well, now 365 days, I'm in hell, oh well
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me

. . .


I don't wanna change my pants Not gonna change my panst Never change... I'm on
fire tonight my pants are fitting right Gonna rock & roll tonight, alright I
don't wanna change my pants Never change... I'm back in brown again they are
my trusted friend You said they looked good last week so I wore 'em again
today I don't wanna chnage my pants Not gonna change my pants Never change...
You can change my shirt, you can change my mind, but don't f**k with my pants
These pants represent a symbol of my individuality and my belief in personal
freedom Come on I'll show you how pants don't fail me now wanna make sweet
love to you...pants I don't wanna change my pants Not gonna change my pants
Never change... Every guy grab a girl everywhere around the world Don't change
your pants, never change your pants It's Saturday night I'm feelin' alright
Don't change your pants, never change your pants Got a monkey on my back Don't
change your pants, never change your pants Baby (x16) You know I'm born to
lose, 'cause gamblin's for fools Don't change your pants Walkin' down the
street, everyone I meet Don't change your pants, never change your pants etc.

. . .


First you get in line. And then you're in the line. And then you wait in line.
And then it's almost time. To get on to the ride Up, up, up, up, up, up, up,
up, weee! Get back in the line. And then you're in the line. And then you
wait in line. And then it's almost time. To get back on the ride. And then
you're on the ride. Up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, weee! Permanacer (x3)
Sentados por favor Permanacer (x3) sentados por favor Up, up, up, up, up, up,
up, up, weee! Get back in the line. And then you're in the line. And then you
wait in line. But someone cuts the line. And they're adding to your time. And
that's not very nice. Kick 'em outta line. And then you wait in line. And then
it's almost time. To get back on the ride. And then you're on the ride. Come
on! Up, up, up, up, up, up, up, up, weee! Get back in the line.

. . .


Johnny Twobags doesn't have the blues and it makes him sad Brings him down
But not down enough to have the blues He's too white to have the blues He
thinks he should be black to have the blues He's too green to sing the blues
and Orange County ain't a breeding ground for blues Oh Johnny do shut up, I
know you think you got it rough You say your life is hard Well you didn't
spend your life stealin' chickens from the rich folks yard Don't play me for
a fool. Even if your band gets dropped from Dr. Dream Chorus: You ain't black
and you ain't blind You're girlfriend's not the cheating kind Well you're
cleaned up and you're off the booze Maybe you weren't meant to sing the blues
Ken is struck in a wheel chair His spine is bent beyond repair He's not
singin' the blues He's too white to have the blues He thinks he should be
black to have the blues He's too green to sing the blues and Orange County
ain't a breeding ground for blues Chorus You don't have to pay no dues or be
born to lose Alot of people would kill to be in your shoes Maybe you weren't
meant to sing the blues

. . .


Kick me, You know that I am a lazy piece of shit an animal on hand outs from
an evil government I've always been a nobody, I'll never be a somebody, unless
I kick some ass or get that drink with the umbrella in it Kick me, you know
that my machine is full of rage Expose me, you know I'm stupid even for my age
Please check out my shitty band, the preachings of an anarchist,the government
can't owe me if I don't believe that it exists Kick me. Kick me harder I need
a good kick. My head is so think Kick me. Kick me harder. Rip me a new one.
I don't even have an old one. I'm so full of shit. Kill me, before some moron
gives me my big chance And I end up a poet/role model buried in France I'm so
high on pot & shit I think that I'm in Ancient Egypt Forgive me, but Seattle's
Junkies don't speak for my generation So full of shit.

. . .


Soup of the day. Flavor of the month.
Stain in your pants from your bleeding cup.
Sell out! Buy in! Never gonna change! Cash out now buy a home on the range.
18 years, I'm still punk. Going back and forth you silly little f**k!
When it goes away, I still stay. No I won't go away not the soup of the day.
Money is good whe it comes your way. Take it now it's your day.
Take it before it goes away. Pay day! Pay day! Get out quick.
It sure beats selling your dick.
I had a dream, a terrible thing like a f**king pig grabbing at a brass ring.
Gimme mine! Got mine! Constant pain with a shotgun remove your brain.
Don't care a f**k about the flavor of the month Soup of the day.

. . .


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