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06.10.2009 |
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I became a crystal healer and my ministry was to the sick
Creeping vines would send out runners and seek me in their numbers
I sold self-help tapes
Go down to the netherworld, plant grapes
And as the word spread of my powers, they would seek me far and wide
All sad faces at my window, I would welcome them inside
I sewed clothes for them, cloaks and capes
Go down to the netherworld, plant grapes
My house will be for all people who have nowhere to go
My supply of shining crystals a shield against the snow
There's more like me where I come from so mark our shapes
Go down to the netherworld, plant grapes
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Pulled off the highway in Missouri and lo, our hearts were heavy laden
Made for the chapel with some spray paint for all the things we'd held in secret
Lord, lift up these lifeless bones
Light cascading through the windows, all the rainbow's heavy tones
He has fixed his sign in the sky
He has raised me from the pit and set me high
Left that place in ruin, drunk on the spirit and high on fumes
Checked into a Red Roof Inn, stayed up for several hours and then slept like infants
In the burning fuselage of my days
Let my mouth be ever fresh with praise
He has fixed his sign in the sky
He has raised me from the pit and set me high
Each morning new
Each day shot through
With all the sharp, small shards of shrapnel
That seem to burst out of me and you
Head down for Kansas, we will get there when we get there, don't you worry
Feel bad about the things we do along the way, but not really that bad
We inhaled the frozen air
Lord, send me a mechanic if I'm not beyond repair
He has fixed his sign in the sky
He has raised me from the pit and he will set me high
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House up in Clear Lake where I used to live
Picked the lock on the front door and felt it give
Touch nothing, move nothing, stand still, keep my ears open for cars
See how the people here live now, hope that they're better at it than I was
I used to live here
I used to live here
I used to live here
I used to live here
Pictures up on the mantle, nobody I know
I stand by the tiny furnace where the long shadows grow
Living room to bedroom to kitchen, familiar and warm
Hours we spent starving within these walls, sounds of a distant storm
I used to live here
I used to live here
I used to live here
I used to live here
Fight through the ghosts in the hallway
Duck and weave
Stand by the door with my eyes closed
When it's time to leave
Steal home before sunset, cover up my tracks
Drive home with old dreams at play in my mind and the wind at my back
Break the lock on my own garden gate when I get home after dark
Sit looking up at the stars outside like teeth in the mouth of a shark
I used to live here
I used to live here
I used to live here
I used to live here
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The path to the awful room that no one will sleep in again
Was lit for one man only, gone where none can follow him
Try to look down the way he had gone
Back of the closet whose depths go on and on and on
And nice people said he was with God now
Safe in his arms
But the voices of the angels that he heard on his last days with us
Smoke alarms
Well, the path to the palace of wisdom that the mystics walk
Is lined with neuroleptics and electric shocks
Hope daily for healing, try not to go insane
Dance in a circle with bells on, try to make it rain
And nice people say he had gone home to God now
Safe in his arms, safe in his arms
But the voices of the angels singing to him in his last hours with us
Smoke alarms, smoke alarms
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Masks hanging on the tomb walls where the coven grieves
Witches hiding in the brambles, ground level down where the dry leaves
Blow and burn slowly
No ground is ever going to hold me
Bright candles in the manor
Where the curse takes hold
Bodies reassembling down where the worms crawl
Make your own friends when the world's gone cold
It gets dark and then
I feel certain I am going to rise again
If not by faith, then by the sword
I'm going to be restored
Build fires to keep the beacon flashing where the earth lies flat
Blood calls to blood as the hours draw down, invent my own family if it comes to that
Hold them close, hold them near
Tell them no one's ever going to hurt them here
Steal the treasure and try to leave town
Fight my way back down
Don't want to hurt anyone
Probably going to have to before it's all done
Take to the hills, run away
I'm going to get my perfect body back someday
If not by faith, then by the sword
I'm going to be restored
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For several days the visitors were here
We saw them turned down and we watched them disappear
Talked about the days they'd said were sure to come
Had a hard time believing
I remember seeing you, my tongue struck dumb
When you first came here from wherever it was you came from
The power in your voice, your rough touch
You keeping care of me, keeping watch
Open up the doors to the tent
Wonder where the good times went
I will do what you ask me to do
Because of how I feel about you
I saw his little face contract as his eyes met light
Tried to imagine anything so bright
You only see it once and then it steals into the dawn
And then it's gone forever
For several hours we lay there, last ones of our kind
Harder days coming, maybe I don't mind
Sounds kind of dumb when I say it, but it's true
I would do anything for you
Open up the promise of the day
Drive the dark things away
I will do what you ask me to do
Because of how I feel about you
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Wake up sixty minutes after my head hits the pillow, I can't live like this
And in the shower I am a sailor standing ready, waiting for the shift list
Everything looks burned up, I'm too scared to look around
Don't feel like going on, but come on, make a joyful sound
If you will believe in your heart
And confess with your lips
Surely you will be saved one day
Try to think of ways to fix myself but everything ends in a cul-de-sac
The beast broke from the barn while we were sleeping, face it, face it, he's not coming back
Don't see what the point is in even trying to fight
Look for the bigger picture when I close my eyes real tight
If you will believe in your heart
And confess with your lips
Surely you will be saved one day
Look for the sign of Daniel
Consider the clues
Wait as long as I have to for good news
Wake and rise and face the day and try to stop the day from staring back at me
Busy hours for joyful hearts and later maybe head out to the pharmacy
Won't take the medication but it's good to have around
A kind and loving God won't let my small ship run aground
If you will believe in your heart
And confess with your lips
Surely you will be saved one day
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In the holding tank I built for myself, it's feeding time
And I start to feel afraid 'cause I'm the last one left in line
The endless string of summer storms that led me to today
Began one afternoon with you, long ago and far away
And someone leads the beast in on its chain
But I know you're thinking of me 'cause it's just about to rain
So I won't be afraid of anything ever again
In the cell that holds my body back, the door swings wide
And I feel like someone's lost child as the guards lead me outside
And if the clouds are gathering, it's just to point the way
To an afternoon I spent with you when it rained all day
And someone leads the beast in on its chain
But I know you're thinking of me 'cause it's just about to rain
So I won't be afraid of anything ever again
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They'd hooked you up to a fentanyl drip
To mitigate the pain a little bit
I flew in from Pennsylvania
When I heard the hour was coming fast
And I docked in Santa Barbara
Tried to brace myself
But you can't brace yourself
When the time comes you just have to roll with the blast
And I'm an eighteen wheeler headed down the interstate
And my brakes are going to give and I won't know until it's too late
Tires screaming when I lose control
Try not to hurt too many people when I roll
Find the harbor freeway and head south
Real tired, head kind of light
I found Telegraph Road, I'd only seen the name on envelopes
Found the parking lot and turned right
I felt all the details carving out space in my head
Tropicana's on the walkway, neon red
Between the pain and the pills trying to hold it at bay
Stands a traveler going somewhere far away
And I am an airplane tumbling wing over wing
Tried to listen to my instruments, they don't say anything
People screaming when the engines quit
I hope we're all in crash position when we hit
And then came to your bedside
And as it turns out, I'm not ready
And as though you were speaking through a thick haze
You said hello to me
We all stood there around you
Happy to hear you speak
The last of something bright burning, still burning
Beyond the cancer and the chemotherapy
And you were a presence full of light upon this earth
And I am a witness to your life and to its worth
It's three days later when I get the call
And there's nobody around to break my fall
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The sun above me and a concrete floor below
Scratch at the chain links, maybe bare my teeth for show
Fed twice a day, I don't go hungry anymore
Feel in my bones just what the future has in store
I pace in circles
So the camera will see
Look hard at my stripes
There'll be no more after me
Laze by the shoreline while the sailors disembark
Scratch out a place to sit and rest down in the dark
Smell something burning downwind just a little ways
They set up camp and sing and sweat and work for days
I have no fear of anyone
I'm dumb and wild and free
I am a flightless bird
And there'll be no more after me
In Costa Rica, in a burrow underground
Climb to the surface, blink my eyes and look around
I'm all alone here as I try my tiny song
Claim my place beneath the sky, but I won't be here for long
I sang all night
The moon shone on me through the trees
No brothers left
And there'll be no more after me
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If my prayer be not humble, make it so
In these last hours, if the spirit waits in check, help me let it go
And should my suffering double, let me never love you less
Let every knee be bent and every tongue confess
And I won't get better
But someday I'll be free
'Cause I am not this body
That imprisons me
I read the magazines somebody brought
Hold them to my failing eyes until my hands get hot
And when the nurse comes in to change my sheets and clothes
The pain begins to travel, dancing as it goes
And I won't get better
But someday I'll be free
'Cause I am not this body
That imprisons me
If my prayer goes unanswered, that's alright
If my path fills with darkness and there's no sign of light
Let me praise you for the good times, let me hold your banner high
Until the hills are flattened and the rivers all run dry
And I won't get better
But someday I'll be free
'Cause I am not this body
That imprisons me
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The clouds explode and then the desert blooms
Someone will need to mop this floor for me
When I emerge, I find my car
Like a cathedral in a dream of the future
Drive until the rain stops
Keep driving
Pull over and blast off when I get the chance
Clear as an insect's wings in the sunlight
Flip on the high stakes radio
Try to sing the words right
Drive until the rain stops
Keep driving
I had his arms tied up behind him
We were together all day
Maybe make Culiacán by sunset
Try to, anyway
High as the clouds now
Flying
Drive until the rain stops
Keep driving
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