Frank Sidebottom
"Oh Blimey It's Christmas"

New York! UK! South America! North Pole!
Oh Blimey it's Christmas
It's Christmas time again
It goes all around this great big world
On the 25th of Decemb..er

Oh Rudolph the red nosed reindeer
Had a very very shiny nose
He works for Father Christmas
He's very fat and wears red clothes
I've not done my christmas shopping yet
Cos the Social have stopped my dole

Oh Blimey it's Christmas
A celebration time of Yule
Christmas is better than Easter time
And I'm no April Fool
(You know I'm not)

Like Good King Wenceslas went out
Without his shoes and socks
He got influenza
And also chicken pox
I've got me special Radio and TV Times
So I can plan ahead
And spend my christmas watching telly
Tucked up warm in bed

I think my mum has organised a party like last year
When Roger's dad, for a bet,
Drank the bath filled up with beer
He ended up in hospital
And he stayed there till New Year

Oh Blimey it's Christmas
I hope we get some snow
Cos I've built meself a fabulous toboggan
And I really really want to have a go
I think my mum's relations are coming here to stay
Oh Uncle Arthur and Auntie Beth
Who always kisses me to death
I wish she didn't have bad breath
Oh no no no no

Christmas is coming
And the turkey's getting fat
Have you seen the price of Christmas cards?
How can I afford that?
(You can't)
Christmas is very expensive
And unfortunately
Following last year's incident
I must replace our Christmas tree
Oh I was only larking but me mum does not agree

Oh Blimey it's Christmas
It's Christmas time again
Oh Blimey it's Christmas
It's Christmas time again

But now it's all commercialised
Oh where did you go wrong
Oh Blimey it's Christmas
Merry Christmas everyone

Merry Christmas everybody!